How do I find safe people to help me process my pain?
There is no easy answer to this but to take it one day at a time. Apart from the counseling options mentioned in my previous post, I found having a community that shared a similar story to me, really helpful. It's amazing how healing it is when someone genuinely extends real understanding toward you.
I would suggest using wisdom and caution when choosing who to tell your story to. In my journey, I have experienced several people who through blissful ignorance have added to the pain through gossip, judgment, careless words, and actions.
I was also very afraid, to tell the truth to my friends and family. I was afraid of gossip and judgment and to tell the truth some folk are just not safe. What is a Safe person? well, I’m glad you asked. A safe person is present and can connect with you. They accept you the way you are without, control, shame or, punishment. A safe person tells the truth and confronts you in love when you need it. It was important to go through this journey to find who my safe people were because I needed a safe place to feel and journey what I had gone through. The hard truth is some family members and friends may not be safe, and or have the capacity to help you. The hope is, there are safe people out there which you can find with the correct tools.
There is a lot to say on this subject. I recommend this book to read:
Safe People- How to find relationships that are safe for you and avoid those that aren’t.
Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend ISBN:9780310345794
It's outstanding and really helpful when trying to navigate relationships.
All I wanted was a safe place to process my pain and begin the journey of healing. One of the places I truly felt safe was in the Restored lives community. The course helps victims through processing the pain of the situation, the legal stuff of going through a divorce, and life after separation. In fact, I decided to raise money for this charity because of how much it helped me. Anytime my single Beautiful Show is bought Restored Lives and Women's aid charities are supported.
If you have not heard the song yet you can hear it here:
https://linktr.ee/ggcreativearts
I hope this has given you some food for thought.
More from me soon
